Ideas for people who don’t like their inner child

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When I was first asked to look for my inner child, I have to say I was not hopeful. How could I have a child within me?

This thought quickly changed though, as I realised I did indeed have a child within myself.
 
The child I saw was not a pleasant sight. If you are reading this section, then I’m sure you understand what I mean, without me having to go into the details of the way I thought.

She was huddled in the corner.

A sorry sight.
Weak, scared, something to be pitied, not loved and cherished.
She was bad. She must be.
She allowed all the bad things to happen. How could I love her?
I’m an adult now, in control of the things I do. Why would I possibly want to get to know this sorry little bundle in the corner?

But there she was. And there she stayed for a while, but once you have seen a thing like that inside yourself, it is difficult to ignore, so instead, I started to think.
Why did I hate this child so much?
Why did I blame her for the things that happened?

She was about 5 years old, so I started looking round at 5 year olds I knew. All I could see were sweet little girls, without a care in the world. Trust wasn’t an idea they had come across, as they had never experienced mis-trust, so I tried to relate this to my own inner child.

Children automatically trust adults to care for them, and as adults, we trust other adults to care for our children.

As I drop my 3 year old off at playgroup, I kiss him, and tell him “Be good!”.
My daughter goes to stay with my sister, with a kiss and a “Do as you are told, and be good.”

Children strive for adult acceptance and love, especially from those close to them. When the trust they have for these people is abused, it leaves them confused and hurt.They have to be good, do as they are told, behave for the adults whose ‘care’ they have been left in, but when safe love isn’t given in return, do we blame the child for trying?

Denying our inner child, or disliking them, ultimately means we are denying and disliking ourselves. However hard you try, they will demand to be heard, trying desperately to make you see it was not their fault, knowing that you are the one person that might understand.

If you do not listen, it is likely that you will suffer from nightmares, as they try desperately to attract your attention, and will probably find ways to ‘come out’ and play when you least expect it!

It’s not the child’s fault that they were abused.
They were used, made to feel bad.
Made to live in misery and confusion.

Now they deserve the chance to be healed, and in doing so, we can only be helping ourselves.


first written by Twilight  (aest forums member/moderator)
with help from Moonbeam (innerchild)

Ideas for people who don’t like their inner child

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This section is currently been updated. Some pages will have moved or may look different.

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